It's not like Bioware are going to have you miss significant chunks of content over it - they already showed that with ME2. I don't see losing somebody at the end of that game to necessarily be a bad thing at all. The pay-off is greater immersion in your own character, in the universe as a whole and in Shepard's motivation to kick Reaper ass. If you made a bad call (and poking the hornet's nest before having everything in place turns out to be a bad call) and it gets somebody killed then you gotta deal with the consequences. It's not about having the 'best' ending, it's about having your own ending.
I think anybody that wants games like this to make sure the player has complete control the whole time, and telegraph the consequence of every action, is missing the point. Getting through it so painlessly and easily made all of the talk about it being a 'suicide mission' seem like just that - talk. Hearing everybody talk about how they lost x or y makes it seem like the ending probably would have had more impact if I'd lost somebody. It was neat, but in some ways I feel like I missed out. First time through without looking anything up I saved everybody (as I'm sure plenty of people did). However I' mnot sure if you'll have time to do the legion mission then. So if you want to have all your squad members survive and the crew alive too, I think you have to do all the loyalty missions and then the mission where you retrieve the codes. If you do up to 2 mission beforehand, you'll lose half of your crew. Basically what you want to do is to go to the save mission right away. Fortunately I hated Jack and Jacob, and they were the only ones to die even though I didn't have legion's loyalty yet (also I was able to save the whole crew).
This time I didn't do the legion mission, and still hadn't done the Jack and Jacob ones. Because I screwed up later and lost 3 party members I went to try it again using a guide.
After I finished it, I went to do a 2nd mission (some distress signal crap), and when I finally went onto the mission only half of the crew survived. I was about to start the legion loyalty mission where the crew got kidnapped.
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